A Companion Piece To My Holding Hands Article

I shared my post about The Significance of Holding Hands on reddit yesterday, and it was mildly successful!

Well, sorta.

My biggest peeve was that most of the comments were the same tired jokes about hand holding being lewd. Hell, the top comment was a guy saying they didn’t even read my thing and just said holding hands makes babies.

Fortunately, a fair few people were actually wonderful and gave me constructive feedback on what I could improve, or go into more detail on.

This is a transcript of the questions I was asked to give more insight on.

While I agree the way the characters hold hands are symbolic, I’d think the context changes everything. Imagine the wrist grab in a chase scene instead. It’s just not the same thing as the wrist grab depicted in your gif, arguably because of the context.

I’m talking about handholding as a narrative tool for drama, not as a free action. A wrist grab in an action scene is straightforward, it’s just the most efficient way to stop a person from leaving. There MIGHT be an emotional context to it, but let’s be honest, one guy just wants to stop another guy from getting away.

Other ideas to what you could have given your thoughts on: Can a hand hold be done wrong (executed wrong by the creators)?

I’d say there’s no “wrong” way to hold hands, just boring and predictable ways. A common cliche is reaching out a hand and asking “do you trust me?”, which is done so often in the exact same way (towards a person who doesn’t often). Another is when a girl or guy overreacts from a handhold for gag purposes.

Do they mean different things in different contexts, or is the core meaning always the same?

The core meaning of holding hands is a gesture of trust and love without saying anything in particular.

The only different type of “holding hands” I can think of is a possessive one, characterized by a vice-like grip on a person. This implies that the holder sees the person as property, not people.

What about hand holding between different genders? Male-male, female-female both romantically and platonic, do they differ?

The only two differences I can gauge is that females often do the interlocking fingers as friends while males usually don’t. Girls tend to be much more open about their feelings, both platonically and romantically, with people of the same gender.

The second, is that guys often do a manly and firm grip instead of interlocking fingers to show their solidarity with each other, as if saying “I don’t exactly know what you’re going through, but I’m always here for you, bro!”. Think Major Armstrong and Sig Curtis meeting for the first time.

Can the way the characters hold hands change, and is there a special character arc or symbolism associated with this switch?

Yes! Hand holds that go from regular ones to interlocking mean a huge upgrade in romantic progress.

What about between different ages, does it still mean the same? An adult and a child or an adult and a dying elder?

Most often, a very gentle grasp is used for parents and children, as they are small and can only hold on to the edges of their parents’ hands.

The double grasp is most often used for dying elders, to show comfort.

That was about it for today! Sorry I just copypasted a conversation from reddit, I’ve been busy making a LOT of drafts for the foreseeable future. Expect the regular style back by Friday 🙂


9 thoughts on “A Companion Piece To My Holding Hands Article

      1. Too true, unfortunately. Still despite all those people it looks like you got some good feedback / readers through it so that’s pretty nice.

        Do you post your content to reddit often?

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Strangely enough, couldn’t find the like button on “The Significance of Holding Hands.”

    Yeah, it’s not surprising to see reddit act like this, but it really is disappointing. Still, glad to see you got some great feedback on an already great article!

    Liked by 1 person

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